The garrison commander’s face was pale as he lowered his telescope. “Well, gentlemen,” he said in a hushed tone as he handed the telescope to one of the recruits, “now we are well and truly fucked.”

“What’s the matter, commander?” asked the other recruit.

“There’s another beaver on the prowl,” his superior officer replied.

The first recruit, who was looking through the telescope, piped up: “Sir, how come the insert paper has a different picture and everything? Did they re-use the same toy in different years? That strikes me as pretty lame.”

“Goddamnit, Jenkins, don’t break the fourth wall like that.”

“Sorry sir. It is lame, though.”

“Yeah, that sucks!” said the second recruit.

“Ha ha ha, you said ‘sucks’. Sucks like a beaver!” Jenkins tittered.

“Ha ha ha, ‘tittered’!”

The commander shook his head. “I really, really hate you two idiots.”