Kinder Eggs (2/150) The Ambasssador


The crowd assembled in the town square stared in awe as the strange blue craft slowly floated to the ground, accompanied by a faint shrill piping noise. “What is it?” the onlookers murmured to each other. Obviously an alien, but was it an invader? Or a benefactor, come to share the secrets of space and time?

“It’s Jesus!” one old lady screeched, waving a plastic crucifix in the air. “It’s Jesus done come back to us from Heaven!” She was quickly hushed by the people around her.

There was a loud, sudden hissing, and the few people who had dared to step forward to touch the strange craft jumped back, as green steam vented from ports on its sides. The golden sarcophagus split along a central seam, and slid open with an unearthly hum.

The strange creature standing within was about five feet tall, and octopoid in shape. Its bright blue skin glistened in the morning sun as it regarded the gathered crowd with its flexible eyestalks, then hopped to the ground.

“Preople ob Fearth!” it trilled. “I pling you greeting ob harnomy end peace!”

Then, due to the tremendous difference in atmospheric pressure between its homeworld and Earth, the alien exploded, covering the entire crowd in bright blue slime.

“He blessed me!” shouted the old woman. “Jesus done blessed me! My lumbago is healed!”

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